Mugabe Breaks Silence
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Harare - In yet another exclusive meeting, Mr. Mugabe finally gave us the reason as to why the votes from last month’s presidential election have not been released.
“The votes cannot be released until I get the new ballots in from China with my name on them…and they were on the ship that was blocked from docking this week,“ he lamented. He ended his statement by railing against the US, stating that they are the reason for the country’s social, political, religious, sexual and economic woes.
The ship that the president is referring to was a steamer from China, stocked with ammunition, grenades, rocket launchers and other standard police tools.
“If America had allowed the steamer to come to port, you would clearly see that I won the election by 80%, and we could begin putting the enemies of state to sleep!“
To clarify, “the enemies of state” are the opposition, and by “sleep”, Mr. Mugabe means death.
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