Does Semenya have Semen?
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Berlin – After completing the 800 meters with a time of 1:56.72 at the world athletics championships in Berlin last week, Caster Semenya was hailed the fastest woman in the world.
Caster Semenya
45 minutes later, there was “speculation” that she might be a man.
To be fair, the question on the International Association of Athletics Federations (IAAF) committee’s mind last week was not whether Caster Semenya was a man per se, but rather if she had little “men” running around inside of her. Semen, to be precise. The IAAF said it was obliged to investigate her gender eligibility after Semenya made improvements of 25 seconds at 1500m and eight seconds at 800m, the kind of improvements that only take place if you are on steroids…or have gonads floating somewhere in your body.
“What do you want from us,” asked an IAAF council member incredulously. “I mean her bloody name says it all. ‘Semen – ya?’ Her surname asks the question, and gives its answer!”
Back in Caster’s native South Africa, the locals are stewing with anger, charging the IAAF with not only racism, but sexism, immoralism, anti-Africanism and any other ism they can come up with.
“These whites are just wicked,” said Amira Mathalo, a monkey nut seller. (And yes, there is such a thing as ‘monkey nut’). “First, they kill us with their apartheid, and then they condemn our women for looking ‘unfortunate’.”
Did it ever occur to the IAAF that perhaps she appears so manly because of the hard living Semenya has had to endure in S.A.’s harsh terrain, Mathalo asked? Or that perhaps Caster has facial hair because unlike her Western counterparts, she can not go to the salon to get a facial wax? Does Limpopo province even have salons??
No one really knows.
“It’s not her fault that God made her a deep voiced, hairy, shapeless woman,” added Mathalo the monkey nut seller. “If I looked like that, I’d run fast too, just to escape reality. Nevertheless, this young girl is a hero…heroine. You know what I mean.”
