Obama Encouraged to Rig 2008 Elections
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All of Africa – Hoping to duplicate Africa’s successful political campaign management model, many of the continent’s presidents are encouraging Barak Obama to tap into his Kenyan roots and rig the 2008 US elections.
“We admire Obama’s push for change,” says Zimbabwe’s deputy minister of finance, “but we want to make sure that change is in the right direction.”
AU leaders have created a suggestion box which they plan to DHL to the Illinois Senator this fall. All suggestions have been written on exercise book paper (some countries, such as Gambia, still don’t have internet or email access) and sent to Eritrea for processing.
The top 3 proposals have been:
1. Stuff ballot boxes with ‘ghost’ names (i.e. voters who have died within the last decade).
2. Threaten /shoot McCain voters before they can get to the ballot
3. Declare himself the winner on all national news outlets and insist that the elections were free and fair.
