Georgia Woos Immigrants with Cotton Picking Simulator
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Roswell, GA – With the global economy in tatters and business and individuals on the hunt for new solutions, a few civic leaders in Georgia have looked to their past find solutions for their own economic stimulus. Enterprising Georgians are bridging their glorious Confederate past with futuristic technology and have created a cotton picking simulator.
Yes, the nation’s first cotton picking simulator is now housed in the historic city of Roswell.
Civic leaders have begun to woo poor immigrants from West Africa with promises of food, shelter and clothing if they are willing to participate to their Cotton Picking Program in exchange for these amenities.
“We like to think of it as being similar to NASA’s space program,” said Judd Lee, who oversees all the cotton pickers. “We’re giving these folks a wonderful opportunity to educate themselves and the masses, and get real world experience at the same time.”
Not every West African is an eligible candidate for the program, as Georgia has very strict guidelines for who can participate. Africans must be at least 5’7’’, dark skinned (to be able to withstand Georgia’s hot summer temperatures) and able to life weights of 60 lbs of more.
The cotton picking program seeks to reacquaint immigrants with the glory days of ‘mandatory volunteerism’ that built America’s infrastructure. For some, it has been a difficult adjustment, as they have never seen cotton in its unrefined form or worked for a white man.
Lee helps them get through the initial rough patch with his own motivational tools. We watch as he guides a participant through the rigors of cotton picking.
“You need to put your back into it,” he coaches. “Bend over a bit more…that’s it. Now pick and push the cotton further down into your gunny sack. Is it feeling a little bit now natural now? Good! Then if you could keep doing this from about sun up to sun down, that would be great!”
Some lighter skinned Africans have objected to the color restrictions that prevent them from participating in the CPP.
“There’s not much to be done about that,” said Judd. “Darker skin has natural SPF. It’s just a necessary requirement for the program. I mean, they don’t let astronauts go to space with a cold, do they? I mean, they just ain’t fit.”
Visitors wanting to support and visit the CPP for an educational tour can buy tickets online at http://www.pickabaleaday.com.
